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Over-exercising was another part of my eating disorder; it was another way to punish myself, and compensate for the food I had eaten. Recovery has been about learning to respect my body, and find alternative ways to move, that nourish my mind, soul AND body.
I’d hoped that the Netflix drama ‘To the Bone’ starring Lily Collins, would provide much needed insight into the grim reality of living with an eating disorder. Unfortunately it failed to explore much beyond the typical anorexic stereotypes, many of us are already familiar with.
The past few years has seen a huge rise in people experimenting with numerous food trends. But when you are recovering from an eating disorder, restricting or cutting out food groups can be incredibly damaging to the body and mind.
Finding my voice has been one of the most challenging aspects of my recovery. When I was unwell, I was immensely shy and unconfident; I didn’t believe I had anything to say of value. I now know this not to be true, and use my voice wherever I can.
Being comfortable in your own skin is not easy, and something I think every girl, boy, woman and man can relate to at some point in their life. It’s easy enough to hide away during the winter months, but as soon as the sun shows up those insecurities can come flooding back.
How do you stop the critical self-talk you have, even when you are feeling unwell? During a spell of flu, I found that it was not about stopping the thoughts, but more about how I counteracted them. I also realised, just how crucial, it is to nourish myself even more.
When I was in the midst of my eating disorder, I couldn’t imagine what my life could be like without it; it had become all I knew. It’s only now I am healed, that I can truly experience all the gifts that life has to offer.
There is nothing like speaking to someone who knows what you are going through; someone who speaks your language. Which is why being given the opportunity to speak to a group of parents and carers meant so much.
Anna is one of my closet friends. She went above and beyond to help me overcome my eating disorder, but even her Italian love for food was not enough to fight the monster in my head.
This is a typical dialogue I would have with myself and others, when I was in my eating disorder. I have written it to help you understand what goes through someone’s mind when their eating disorder is challenged.
We are half way through Eating Disorders week both here and in the USA, so this seemed an appropriate time to share with you all, my new project titled ‘Jiggsy’.